Chapter 25

Long long ago, in a land far far away…

The wind blew and the leaves rustled. Change was in the air and Quackling moved on to a new phase in her queer, queer influenza. For all intents and purposes, as far as anyone could tell, she was normal. Hyper-normal, in fact.

She slept early and woke with abnormal burst of energy. She talked animatedly and socialised, made her nest clean and squeaky enough to attract tons of rats (rats are clean, okay?!), fished for food without complaint, then roasted them with delicious herbs and spices, quacked some songs, and was even training her water legs to move faster on dry ground.

She felt the best that she’s felt in years – you know why? Because she felt nothing. That’s right, hurray! No more sadness, no more love. She thought nothing. No unhappy pasts or unhappily ever afters. There was just the present, and her incredible self-satisfaction at being incredibly self-sufficient. Nothing, no one, could affect her anymore. She was careful to be kind and friendly to everyone. But friends sucked and she sure didn’t need any to be highly functional. And as long as she was functional, who cares what was going on in her heart? Then the wind blew and the leaves rustled.

That’s all folks. The end.

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